Mostly Unpacked

Overall, the move has gone well. I have the kitchen all unpacked and organized, my bedroom all unpacked and organized and the kids' bedrooms are all done, except for Riley's bed (still in storage) and Brittney's room (currently in the front parlor but will eventually be downstairs).


I was a bit frustrated with the kids this first week because even though we had all their stuff ready, every day someone forgot something for school. A backpack, a paper, a gym bag, etc. Then I realized that I took off for Sioux Falls one day without my debit card, checkbook, ID, purse or any money. Oops!!! Good thing I had a full tank of gas and a free cup of coffee. So I can't be too hard on my kids for being a bit overwhelmed by life right now because it appears that I'm right there with them!

Some of Today's Accomplishments

 

Sophia and Taylor have a big closet but it had nothing in it.

Today we hung the bar to hang Sophia's clothes.

Later we'll add shelves.

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 Even though we went from a house with two bathrooms to a house with three and the option for a fourth, mirror time is still a commodity. So today I got Taylor a mirror and we hung it in her room.

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I also took Taylor and one of her new neighborhood friends to the Dollar Store tonight. You don't have to spend a lot of money to have fun. She picked out a few things for her room, including this wall sticker for her door. She felt special, her room has some cute things and I only spent nine dollars!

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We were finally able to have internet installed today.

This is just a picture of the router in the office.

Gerald says it's really fast.

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 Our final project for the evening was putting up a small cupboard/shelf in our bathroom.

Sophia

Sophia decided to stuff a large number of her stuffed animals into the backside of her pajamas. It makes me laugh every time she walks away.

Concert

I was relieved that Zeke's track practice, Riley's baseball and Anthony's baseball were all cancelled tonight because of the weather. That allowed us to concentrate on Taylor's orchestra concert.

Kids

I love having so many neighborhood kids in our new house.

FYI

We are scheduled for internet hookup tomorrow at the house so I will have access to a computer again. It will make blogging much easier, hence longer stories.

We finished tearing out the carpet in the dining room. We'll eventually be tearing out the old walls, redoing the wiring putting up sheetrock, painting and refinishing the old wood floor in there. 

But the next priority is Brittney's room in the basement. The next step there will be the electrical wiring for outlets and lights. Then we should be able to sheetrock.

Today I turned in paperwork to apply for a variance so we can put up a fence in our back yard.

Lots of work yet to be done, but so worth it!  Check out my favorite part of my bathroom.

40

I turned 40 today. Seems like a good age to me so far.  ;-)

Spent the day doing normal stuff but I did have a few highlights, including:

Grocery shopping with Steve but zero kids.

Spontaneous coffee stop and finding friends there to chat with for two hours.

Organizing most of the kitchen in the new house.

Birthday phone call from my brother and lots of texts and fb messages from friends and family.

My dad completing the hook ups on our washer and dryer and venting the dryer outside, so now we can have clean clothes again.

Running into a few gals who burst into the happy birthday song when they saw me, then gave me a cupcake, fruit kabob, coffee with vanilla creamer and numerous hugs.

Supper out with Steve. At a great steak place. With no kids.

Neighborhood Kids

I absolutely love the fact that we had a house full of neighborhood kids yesterday and today! Ones that our kids didn't really even know before. I even met some adults too.

Then there was the fun visit by some old friends because of another incredible God   moment. These miracles are really piling up!!!  More on that later.

Lol

I was trying to send a text to Riley to let him know who would be picking him up. My message was supposed to say, "Dad is getting you."

My phone auto corrected it to say, "Dad is getting tipsy."

Lol!

We're Official

As of yesterday, we are the proud owners of our new home!

The kids have already had lots of neighborhood kids over to play.

Now we're tearing into the dining room. The carpet was nice but there are origional 100 year old hardwood floors under the carpet, padding, glue, etc. It'll be hard work but should be worth it to restore it.

Closing

All of the glitches with the house sale and house purchase have been worked out by God. Details later. Scheduled to close at 11:30 & 2:00 tomorrow. Writing now from my childhood room.

Anthony Says

For those of you not in the horror movie loop, Chucky is a demented doll who goes around killing people.

Anthony and I had the following conversation yesterday:

A: "I'm gonna regret watching Chucky when I'm older."

Me: "Have you ever seen any of the Chucky movies?"

A: "No."

Me: "Then why would you regret watching it in the future?"

A: "He seems like a really hygienic doll."

I honestly have no idea what goes through this kid's mind sometimes.

No Electronics

My kids were worried about what they were going to do for four days with nothing in the house and no cable or internet. I knew they'd be ok.

They found an old deck of kids' cards, pulled up the cooler for a table and made up their own game. :-)

Rapid part 2 - Art Alley

Rapid

Driving

It all looks the same

Bench

New wood was put on the park bench. A very specific bench that used to hold a terrible inscription. I wonder if this means the old can be still be made better?

Going to my brother................

Going back into hibernation. Tired of life right now.

Crazy Friends!

Coby's Party

Riley Says

While we were at the church last night, Riley asked if he could have some tea. Sure. Why not?

He was busy in the coffee area for quite a while and then he brought his tea over and wanted me to taste it. I refused but he persisted, so I tried it. It was so sweet I almost spit it out! When I asked him how much sugar he put in it, he insisted that he hadn't used any sugar. I insisted he had. He was adamant that he used no sugar.

So we went back over to the coffee area and he showed me what he used to make his 'tea'.

These were the exact ingredients.

Bella

We're so excited that my parents decided to adopt our latest foster dog, Bella!  She's the sweetest thing ever! 

Donut Day

Taylor usually goes grocery shopping with me early Saturday morning. I make a weekly menu and grocery list the night before. The deal Taylor and I have is that if our grocery bill stays under our $100 weekly budget, we get donuts.

Today was a donut day :-)

You Read my Mug

Trying To Be a Better Parent

My friend Kim and I are trying to hold each other accountable for our parenting. My goal for this week is to give each one of my kids a hug before bed. It might not seem like a big deal but considering the varied ages of the kids, combined with the fact that I don't really do hugs, it's a stretch.

Tonight was the first night. I started with Sophia, who I hug all the time anyway. Next was Anthony, who always wants a hug but is usually too clingy for me to feel comfortable. Both Anthony and Zeke were thrilled with a hug from me before bed. Then it was on to Taylor, who is normally very snuggly with me. But when I purposely tried to give her a hug, she ran away. I chased her down and hugged her anyway. Even though she screamed, she was trying not to smile.

Riley had a friend over and they were going to an overnight youth activity at the church tonight. I gave him his hug in the driveway before we left at 10pm. Brittney and her boyfriend drove up as we were getting ready to leave. I slowly walked up to her in the driveway and gave her a big hug.....and she let me. I was really surprised because usually she wouldn't let anyone but Gerald that close to her. As I let go and backed up, I noticed that she had a horrified look on her face. Then in a small voice she asked me, "What's wrong? Did my dog die?"

Perhaps I need to partake in this hugging thing more often.

When I told Brittney about the pact with Kim and trying to become a better parent, she informed me, "Well, you can't just go around hugging your kids!"

Not Quite Normal

I've been posting a lot about the house and fun pictures but there's more to our lives. Even though it usually looks on the outside like we have it all together as a family, we really don't. It's continually a learning process and struggle. I think all parents would say the same thing but there are things in our life that are definitely far different from "regular" families.

We are not quite normal, whatever normal is.

Here's just a sampling of some of the differences:

Stealing

When I come home, I can't just hang up my purse. Every single time, I have to take my debit card and any cash and lock it into this small safe with a combination lock. If I get lazy and don't, most of the time, the money will disappear by the time I get back to it. I have two children who will steal. I can't even count the number of times things have gone missing in our house. It's hard on me but probably even harder on siblings. Thankfully, we have one child who used to steal but has finally come to understand the value of personal property.

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Birth Families

 We have a lot of interaction with all types of birth families. This picture is of Sophia's bio paternal grandma and two of Sophia's half siblings. We ran into them at a boy scout spaghetti feed. The healthy connections are fine but there is a lot of pressure on me to make sure the situation stays appropriate for Sophia. All of these relationships are complicated.

Bio connections we maintain:

Sophia's bio mom, maternal grandparents, aunts, uncles and cousins

Sophia's paternal grandma, aunt, uncle and half-siblings

Riley, Zeke and Anthony's maternal grandparents, step-grandparents, aunts and uncle

Riley and Zeke's bio dad, paternal grandma, aunt and cousin

My bio mom, brothers, nieces and nephews

Some of my maternal aunts, uncles, cousins and relatives

Bio connections we don't maintain:

Sophia's bio father (In prison for statutory rape)

Riley, Zeke and Anthony's bio mom (our choice to maintain very limited contact)

Anthony's bio father (he has never had any contact and willingly gave up rights at birth)

My bio father & family (his choice)

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Special Needs

We have a son with cerebral palsy. In a lot of ways, he's just like other kids but in other ways, he's quite different. We've spent significant amount of time in the hospital over the past few years and gone to many hours of various therapies. It takes Zeke a lot longer to do things than other children, both physically and developmentally. He's already progressed from crawling at age 4, to walking with the aid of a walker, to complicated surgeries on his spine and legs making him temporarily wheelchair bound, to walking on his own now with just his braces. There are lots of IEP meetings, therapies, Special Olympics activities, hospital and doctor visits and other things that require much more attention than the other kids. Zeke is also one of my kids that likes to pocket things that don't belong to him, so in addition to it being a physical struggle to get him through a store, I also have to watch him like a hawk. Chronologically, Zeke is 11, which means he'll be hitting puberty soon. Socially, he's more like a 2-3 year old. Emotionally, probably 4-5. Educationally, he's about 8 years old. Zeke requires a lot of time and attention and probably always will.

We also have other children with emotional special needs. Thank goodness for good therapists and friends that are only a phone call away.

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Sleep Issues

 This is kind of a weird one but I'll try to describe it anyway. A few of my children from foster care (Riley & Zeke) can sleep anywhere. In fact, for quite a few years, Riley actually preferred to sleep on the floor if we would let him. It didn't matter where he was or who he was with, Riley was so used to various sleeping places in his past that he could sleep anywhere. This picture was taken a few years ago in the lobby of a hotel.

On the other hand, I have two kids from foster care (Anthony & Sophia) that literally go crazy when they have to sleep somewhere else. Going to bed doesn't bother them. It's after they're almost asleep that they fight the sleep. They seem to not really know where they were.

Anthony doesn't do this much anymore but the first three years he lived with us, sleep was challenging. At home it was usually ok as long as I rocked him until he fell asleep. If we were anywhere else, he would almost fall asleep and then he would start screaming. I remember one time we were staying with a friend of Steve's in Oklahoma for Staci's graduation and Anthony screamed most of the night. He wouldn't let me hold him, he wouldn't let me put him down. He just wouldn't be comforted. I finally just took him out to our van, buckled him into his car seat and let him scream. I think he lasted until 4am. He was three years old.

Sophia still does the same thing if we're in a hotel but not to the extreme that Antony did. The reunion last month was a bit tricky the first night. By the second night, she was so tired, she didn't last as long.

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This is by no means an exhaustive list of the major differences in our family. I don't write about these kinds of things to complain. I just don't want to give anyone the mistaken impression that we have this life thing all figured out. Some days I survive just by trying to make it until bedtime. Other days, something happens with the kids that makes me remember why it's all worthwhile.

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So our family is definitely not quite normal but we're ok with that, most of the time ;)