Anthony

There's no school today so I've got my super-powered headphones on again this morning.
Currently playing: Miami Sound Machine; next up God of Angel Armies, then Every Rose Has It's Thorns :) 


I did connect with my kids earlier this morning though. We did some chores around the house and then Riley and Zeke packed lunches so they could go to the Boys & Girls Club. It's a bank holiday so Steve went to Lowes to get some more home-fixing stuff.


Steve and I are going to a funeral later this morning. Her death was expected but still a bit sad. We're taking Anthony, Taylor and Sophia with us. After the funeral, Sophia and Taylor will be staying with my parents and I'm taking Anthony to his therapy appointment in Sioux Falls. During this current school year, he goes about once a month. My parents usually take him but I need to visit with his therapist so I'm taking him today. I'm kind of hoping that Steve will go along too.


I've been struggling with Anthony lately. He is a very smart kid and can easily get along with people. When we have issues, it is usually when an authority figure tries to correct him or get him to do something he doesn't want to do. In just the past two weeks, we've had issues at basketball, the Boys & Girls Club, church and at home.


Basketball: He likes it and wants to play. I drop him off every Tuesday night and Saturday morning for an hour of practice. Last week when Steve picked him up at the gym, all the other kids were running drills with the coaches and Anthony was on the other side of the gym throwing his basketball at garbage cans. Steve watched as another kid approached him and asked what he was doing. Anthony then tried to throw the ball at the other kid. Steve intervened at that point.  When I talked to Anthony later, he just said that it was hard work and his arm hurt from dribbling so he didn't want to do it anymore.


Boys & Girls Club: Last Thursday there was no school because of an impending blizzard. Zeke and Anthony went to The Club because I had an appointment in Sioux Falls. I probably shouldn't have gone but the weather was ok when I left and I really needed to go. In spite of everything, I'm still glad I went. Anyway, while at The Club, Anthony had a run-in with the gym teacher. Anthony was grabbing a bar and doing pull-ups on it. The teacher asked him not to do it again Anthony did it anyway. Then the teacher told Anthony that because he wasn't following directions, he could not help clean up. Then Anthony told the teacher, "Now I'm going to start getting pissed off."  According to the teacher, Anthony was upset and didn't understand why he was receiving a checkmark. The Club staff write up a report, discuss it with the child, have the child sign it and then give it to the parents at pick-up time.When the teacher wrote his paperwork, Anthony refused to sign it. It became a battle of wills and ultimately, Anthony won. Later, Anthony went up to the front desk and just stood there staring at the staff without saying anything. They were very unnerved and called Steve after The Club closed.


Church: Last Wednesday, instead of participating in large group, Anthony was messing around and hiding behind curtains and just generally not paying attention and distracting himself and others. He seems to think he can do whatever he wants there.


Home: I can't even begin to list all the times Anthony and I have butted heads. It usually involves his actions with his siblings. He always believes that it's not his fault or responsibility. Which is difficult at the moment but impossible when trying to get him to understand why he needs to change his behavior the next time.


His therapist believes that basketball is good for him so we haven't pulled him from basketball. I'm not going to be utilizing The Club for Anthony if at all possible, at least for a while. I've also kept him home from church on Wednesday nights but I kept him with me during my class on Sunday. He wasn't very happy and neither was I, but it worked out ok. If I was going to do some good parenting, I'd just go with him to his class and large group. That's what I did for quite a while with Riley. I'm not ready to be that good of a parent for Anthony yet I guess. I selfishly want to go to my own class.


I wish I could take my therapist with me to Anthony's therapy appointment :/


Kim reminded me that we only have a short amount of time to impact these kids so we don't have any time to lose. The longer Anthony struggles, the harder it will be to help him.
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